1. |
I-1. Interlude
03:45
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A lone streetlight
Fades behind you
You close your eyes
I’m by your side
Waiting for you
Just cross the line
Cross the line
A blood red sign
Beckons to you
You stop in time
One look behind
Nothing for you
Leave it behind
It’s all behind
This is the start
This is something new for us
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2. |
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Ski Club at night
With the volume at 20
Isn’t it funny what we remember?
Andy is singing
Of how Martha sways
And I can’t help but think about her now
And I’m holding her now
Her chin on my shoulder, her shelter grows colder
And I now
I fear her dissolving
Into those thick revolving clouds
I don’t want you to go
Here I am sobbing
To some dance at a party
And thinking the story will end up mine
I’ve seen what death
Does to innocent hearts
And I think of how dark it is without you
And I’m here without you
In a four-person car
With all seat-warmers on
And I know
That the end, it is distant
But these roads are so persistent now
I don’t want you to go
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3. |
I-3. When We Were Young
03:48
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There was a time when we were young
We were out to change the world
So we picked up our guitars
And we waited for the girls
I was proud and full of grit
But I’d melt like a candlestick
Dripped all over my guitar
I did not go very far
Maybe I’m mad
Maybe I’m a child
Maybe I’m bad
Maybe I’m just deaf
Maybe I should stop
Every time I pluck a string
I remember everything
And I cry on my guitar
And I sing with all my heart
Maybe I’m mad
Maybe I’m a child
Maybe I’m bad
Maybe I’m just deaf
Maybe I should stop
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4. |
I-4. Drink
05:10
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Drink
It is all you are
It is how you feel
Anything at all
Drink
It is all you do
It is how you breathe
It helps you make things real
It is how you feel
Drink
It is how you feel
It helps you make things real
Drink
It is your escape
It is how you dream
Anything but here
Drink
Anesthetic arms
It is how you sleep
It helps you make things real
It is how you feel
Drink
It is how you feel
It helps you make things real
Why can’t you just be
Anything but you?
So drink.
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5. |
I-5. Reefer Madness
03:26
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She says it’s the end of the world
So I’ve heard
I think she’s got one bad case of nerves
Won’t you breathe in, breathe out
Put that blunt down
You are just stoned
Make sure she’s not (alone)
Alone again, here we are
Separate from time and space
I can’t feel my face
Reach out for your destiny
Just try not to lose your mind
One foot at a time
She says she thinks she’s going to hurl
Help that girl (help that girl)
I think she’s got one bad
case of nerves
Won’t you try to sit down
Stop spinning around
You are just fine
Stop wasting my time
It’s time to leave this basement
Reefer madness took her mind
Wait ’til she unwinds
She’s laughing to nothing
I think that she should be confined
To protect mankind
I’m feeling light-headed
Let’s get home, leave this behind
One foot at a time
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6. |
I-6. Worth It
03:33
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I’ve realized it may hurt
But now I know it was real
Now, while the sky’s falling down
I’ve never felt more alive
You taught me how I could love
How to trust and how to smile
I’ve realized it may hurt
But it was worth it all the while
Whatever may become of us
Whatever time may reconcile
It was worth it all the while
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7. |
I-7. Method Acting
05:08
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There’s a method to this madness
Play a stranger in a lover’s skin
Lose yourself and let the magic
Print your likeness on a roll of film
Reach inside, you may like
What you find within your mind
Something’s wrong with me
I can’t find my normal self
Don’t let go of me
Something's wrong with me
I can't find my normal shell
Don't let go
There’s a strangeness to this acting
When you start to cry another’s tears
Your personality’s erratic
Borrowing a voice that isn’t yours
Reach inside, you may like
What you find within your mind
Something’s wrong with me
I can’t find my normal self
Don’t let go of me
Something's wrong with me
I can't find my normal shell
Don't let go of me
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8. |
I-8. Sablier
04:44
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Calm night
With a face so white
Mistaken for a piece of art
White noise
A starry grain
And you fall off into the dark
Goodbye
Oh, world
Have you found her smile
As it streaks across your barren sky
And hits my eye
Time flies
Escapes a sigh
And implodes inside your little heart
Those precious eyes, they fall apart
Somewhere out there
Time broke your heart
Somewhere out there
You broke my...
Cold hands
An embrace of sand
As it pours out the hourglass
Somewhere out there
Time stole my...
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9. |
I-9. Try Hard
03:36
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I try too hard
To please myself
And I wonder why I’m unlike anyone else
And I wonder why I want to be somebody else
I try too hard
To be myself
And I wonder why I have nobody else
And I wonder why I’m hated by everyone else
It takes a special type of finesse to screw up being oneself
Kick him while he’s down and steal his eco-friendly wallet while he dribbles on himself
Well it’s our time now
Yeah, it’s our time now
I try too hard
It takes a special type of finesse to screw up being oneself
Kick him while he’s down and steal his eco-friendly wallet while he dribbles on himself
Well it’s our time now
Yeah, it’s our time now
Wake up people, look at what you’ve done, look what you’ve become
You’re exactly what they want
‘Cause it’s our time now
Yeah, it’s our time now
I try too hard
To end myself
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10. |
II-1. Her
02:40
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And you’re still there
I hold you in my dreams
Your hair brushes my cheek
And I wake up
Clutching the covers
Listening for whispers
Ghost of a nightmare
I see you, hear you, feel you everywhere
A final imprint on my pillowcase
My beloved, you were everything
You kept my world safely in your arms
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11. |
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Counting the leaves on the trees just to feel less alone while the sun holds its breath
Watching the porch lights come on just to feel more at home while the sky goes to bed
Looking through old photographs just to feel less alone
Picking at hairs on the sheets just to feel more at home while the clock takes a rest
Listening to laughs in the street just to feel less alone while the pavement welcomes its guests
Hanging your clothes next to mine just to feel more at home
Reading your letters aloud just to feel less alone
All alone, endlessly checking the phone
Get up one day and...
I talk to myself in my sleep just to feel less alone while the shadows collide
I find myself wearing a mask just to feel more at home while my real face hangs down by my side
Call out to ghosts from the past just to feel less alone
Send myself out with the trash just to feel more at home
All alone, endlessly checking the phone
All alone, I sing while my heart turns to stone
Get up one day and... gone. You’re gone.
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12. |
II-3. Old Friends
02:47
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So long, my old friend
Until we meet again
It kills me to watch you melt
Into the cracks, into the concrete on which I walk
Primal self-defence
Trying to keep my head
Words fall off the shelves
And shatter into millions of pieces
And when you’ve had enough
You shut down
And if you’ve had enough
You shut down
Force yourself, make me happy
Clarity
Tell yourself that you love me
Say it, softly
Sadly
So long, my old friend
Until we meet again
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13. |
II-4. Heroin(e)
03:21
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Pretty poison
Ocean eyes
Acquiescent smile
But all these memories
Get too close
And I overdose
You are my heroin(e)
Silent whisper
Sleight of hand
Evanescent touch
These lucid daydreams
Get too close
And I am comatose
I feel you coursing
Through my veins
Running through my brain
Let me see her
One more time
Just one last time
You are my heroin(e)
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14. |
II-5. Red Eyes
03:52
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The world is still spinning when you’re not around
Forgive my surprise, I hoped I was wrong
And the sky had turned grey and the air had gone flat
But my skin stayed intact, I did not disappear
Now, why are you here, if not for someone else?
Why do you live, if not for anyone else?
I find myself crying ‘cause you’re not around
Forgive my red eyes, I thought you would too
And my heart tried to give while my lungs screamed your name
But my pulse stayed the same and the silence pushed through
Now, why are you here, if not for someone else?
Why do you live, if not for anyone else?
Why do you grieve, if not for someone else?
Why do you breathe, if not for anyone else?
The world is still spinning when you’re not around...
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15. |
II-6. Distractions
05:25
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Say what you will
If you could choose to create an illusion
If you could hide it all behind a curtain
If you could let it brood inside your stomach
I would
I’ve got so many distractions now
But it’s too late
Dream the ideal
If could make a space in which you accept it
If you could find a way where you may forget it
If your reveries became the authentic
I would
I’ve got so many distractions now
But it’s too late
Begin again
What I wouldn't give to begin again
The innocence of being friends
The nervous reaching for your hand
To forget again
To restart again
Here I go again
Begin again
What I wouldn't do to begin again
To fight the curse of the modern man
To bring us back to how we were then
To forget again
To restart again
Here I go again
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16. |
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Do you remember the morning after
When our love was a fire
The amateur arsonist fell for the flower
And I could not bear to burn the one thing that mattered
We listened for hours to the strings of our hearts
Our gazes transfixed on all moving parts
And you were the only one that could start
To paint me a smile like a new piece of art
We built a fire on a damp night in May
The embers enveloped us and took us away
We sat by the dock and let the waves soothe our pains
I picked at the wood to expose all the wane
I said, “beauty is the center when all else falls away,
“and love is for those who are truly insane.”
We built a fire on a damp night in May
The embers enveloped us and took us away
Our love was a fire
Our love was a fire that burned all else away
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Matt Thibeault North Bay, Ontario
NOMFA Award-winning artist from North Bay, Ontario.
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